Wednesday, March 16, 2005

With a smile

Hi, welcome to Matucci’s, my name is Michael and I’ll be taking care of you tonight. While you’re looking at the menu, can I interest you in some fresh Bruschetta or a bowl of our Tuscan Minestrone?

No? Ok, that’s fine. I’ll be back in just a minute to take your drink orders – oh, okay. A Miller draft and an Arnold Palmer for the lady. May I see your license, sir? No, really. I’m not kidding. Great, thanks.

All right, would you like to hear about our specials tonight? We have a super fresh Chilean Sea Bass, as well as some – oh, you don’t? Ok, fair enough. I hear you loud and clear. Roger that. Ok, so we have one Quattro Stagione and a Penne a la Vodka with extra cream. Oh, and another Miller. All right, thanks very much. Let me know if you need anything. Name’s Michael.

Okay, we’ve got a hot plate here – the Quattro? Who had the Quattro? Of course. Here you are, sir. And the Penne for you, ma’am. Oh! Yet another Miller for the good gentleman. I’ll be back in two shakes with the refill. And more bread for the lady, gotcha.

All right guys, how is everything? I see you are making some progress on the Penne, ma’am. Yes, you are putting it away. Woo! I’ll be back with a Miller and another Arnie for you.

Hey folks, I thought I’d bring our dessert platter over here to share with you. Here we have our special homemade Tiramisu; this is our house Cannoli; and we have my favorite, our Sinfully Sweet Chocolatey Cake – it’s a doozy, let me tell you, ma’am! And we also have a selection of gelati and sorbet. Now would anybody like a coffee or a Mochaccino?

Wow, you are doing some damage to the Chocolatey Cake, huh? Man. Good thing I brought those extra napkins earlier! Oh, looks like it’s Miller time yet again. BRB!

All right, I am just going to put the check right over here. Do NOT feel pressure to pay this any time soon! Really! Now I will just remove this dessert plate if you will let me – no? Ok, super. We will leave the plate here. Thanks.

Sir? Sir? First of all, don’t worry about that spill – I’ll have Rodrigo mop the floor and sweep the glass up, and I’ll have another Miller sent over pronto. But I did want to let you know that there was an error processing your card. Yes, I did try cleaning the strip. And I actually did enter the numbers manually.

Sir, I wish I could use that card, but unfortunately we don’t accept Sam’s Club here.

Well, that is quite a lady you have on your hands, sir! Not only can she eat a great meal, but she can pay for it, too! A real gem. Looks like it’s your lucky day! Well, here are your leftovers – well, really just the pizza crust, that was the only thing left. I wrote the date on the lid so you’ll know. Ok, thank you both so very much, it was really a treat. Come back soon now. Buh-bye.

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