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Tuesday, December 18, 2007

Can't sleep

"I can't sleep at night, when you are on my mind, Bobby Womack's on the radio, singing to me 'if you think you're lonely now...'" That's a line from the 2005 Mariah Carey hit, "We Belong Together." When I think of the phrase, "I can't sleep," that's the line that my mind inevitably recalls. Thanks, brain. Definitely helping out here.

Why can't I sleep? What's on my mind?

1. It's too hot in the apartment; the heater's been on for days to combat the icy winter dreck outside. My skin is starting to feel crackled and scaly, like I'm made of tectonic plates.

2. I set the alarm to wake up for a 6:45 strength class tomorrow, which always leaves me feeling anxious to a completely unnecessary degree over stupid, made-up problems. What if I get to the class too late to claim an optimal spot, leaving me uncomfortably close to the front or the back? What if I miss the warm-up? What if, God forbid, I miss the class all together? Also, who the hell cares?

3. I have my last exam tomorrow, thank God. I want to beat it with a shovel.

4. Then I'm going to the law firm holiday party, which should be fun. I hope it's not awkward, though, and that I can navigate the social currents in a good way. Be dashing, charming, etc, always leave them wanting more.

5. I'm hungry, and it's too late at night to eat.

I looked outside and all the windows are dark in the buildings across the street -- it's a lonely vigil tonight. Today was a strange day; we slept really late, until 11, and I only left the house once, to grab some dinner. The day was getting dark before I had the chance to acknowledge it; in some ways I feel like time just passed me by. Maybe that's unsettling, too. "Don't let real love pass you by." That's from a Boyz II Men song I liked, but nobody else ever heard it.

Now I will try to sleep again...at least tomorrow I can pencil in some time for a nap. Assuming I make the gym class, of course. I'm trying to type quietly so as to not disturb L, but I don't know if it's working. In any event, my mind is now empty before you.

Goodnight.

3 comments:

anp said...

Congratulations on finishing your semester! You are officially 83.3% done with Fordham!

By the way, how dare you assume your readers do not know who Nathan Morris, Michael McCary, Shawn Stockman, and Wanya Morris are and what BIIM sing? The song is "Water Runs Dry" from "II" (1994).

MKD said...

Au contraire, my friend -- the song is "Pass You By," from the 2000 release "Nathan Michael Shawn Wanya." Although "Water Runs Dry" is indeed excellent.

Anonymous said...

Congratulations to you and congratulations to me! Freedom!

Hope the party was fun and you went easy on the vino. =)